By:   Lisa Hayes

I can’t count the number of times I’ve asked a client how they define love and they draw a blank.  I’m talking about what it means to love another person.    Love might feel like one of the undefinable, intangible things.  However, it’s hard to actually get anything you can’t define.  Figuring it out is worth the effort.  It’s a bit like setting sail in the Pacific Ocean hoping to get to Hawaii without a course.  You might get there, but chances are very, very remote.  More than likely you will drift aimlessly for a very long time, or even forever.  This explaining why I drifted aimlessly in search of love for so many years of my life.

To me the short definition of love is something you do.  Not necessarily something you feel.  Love is a verb.  The longer answer is much more personal.

Love is an intense feeling of awe and appreciation for another.

It is a devotion that is so strong that although I see them for who they are, flaws and all, the devotion itself eclipse judgement or resentments.

That appreciation and devotion causes me to want their well being so intensely that taking care of them, tending to the happiness of the other, is in fact an act of self love.  

Therefore, in it’s execution, loving another is something I do, for myself.

Love is a verb.

But, like I said, that’s my personal nirvana.  That’s my island in the Pacific.  It’s much easier for me to navigate to because I can define it.  I can chart a course.  I know when I get there, and equally important, I know when I’m not there.

So, your turn.  What does love mean to you?